OK Boomer.

Pop Quiz time. It’s time to separate the Babies from the Boomers. The rules are simple: go down the list and award yourself a point for every term you can correctly define. I’ll even give you some clues – Marshmello isn’t something that goes on hot chocolate and Depop isn’t what an Italian calls a fizzy drink. No Googling or help from younger counterparts allowed. Stay tuned – all answers will be revealed next week by our SELFHOOD network.

Would Anyone Like a Peanut?

Going outside is proper overrated at the best of times. And it’s not the best of times right now. But don’t just take it from me – take it from this important public service announcement courtesy of Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. For once, going to The Winchester and waiting for this all to blow over is not an adequate response. If you’ve seen Shaun of the Dead then you’ll love this video – and if you haven’t, then now’s probably a good time to watch it.

Grin and Bear it.

Delight, terror, confusion. These are all words that describe how I felt when I first watched Harry Potter. They are also words that describe the range of reactions you’ll get if you put on a bear costume and take photographs of strangers. Julian Master spent 3 days patrolling the streets of New York doing just that, and the results are great. Street photographers may find themselves twiddling their thumbs for a little while, so it feels like a good time to give a shout-out to this Kodiak with a Kodak.

The Sims 4 All.

Unusual-looking people speaking gibberish and occasionally bursting into flames – I always liked The Sims because of how much it reminded me of my home life. So if you’re looking for a new hobby but don’t want to read a book because it’s just sooo hard, then you’re in luck, as The Sims 4 has just been re-released for a measly $5. A small price to pay to build the family that you’ve always wanted.

Netflix Party.

Watching Netflix with friends can be a great time – but it can also be very annoying. Incessant fidgeting, needlessly-loud chewing, general bad smells – if only there was a way to watch a film with your loved ones without having to be physically near them. Well, now there is; thanks to a crafty group of software developers and an unofficial Google Chrome extension. As well as synched-up playback, this extension comes with a group chat feature – so nobody will ever have an excuse to talk the whole way through a film. And if they persist in doing so, you can just mute them. Sign me up.

Meet the Squishies.

We’re here to bring you coolsh*t, not the news – there are plenty of outlets for that at the moment. So I thought I’d leave you with something other-worldly and just downright bizarre. If you’re squeamish or have just eaten, maybe look away now. Meet Dave, Clive, Burt and Hilary. Together they make up The Squishies – Daisy Collingridge’s collection of gloriously grotesque flesh suits apparently modelled on her dad. I’m sure her dad was delighted with the comparison, so I’d like to make one of my own – because the Burt figure looks uncannily similar to my friend Burt, who will be reading this right now, presumably seething. So for one final health, wellbeing and exercise tip: stay indoors, have a Shaun of the Dead Netflix Party, and do reps of the “Burt Lunge” until your heart’s content.